07/20/10
THE HUSBAND’S RESPONSIBILITY
IN CHOOSING A CHURCH
There have been a number of cases where a husband believed the Free Presbyterian Church of Scotland was the right church to join but his wife felt otherwise. What is a husband to do in such a case? I agree with the comments of a friend who wrote this opinion:
“The man is the head of the house, and the head of the woman, not the other way around. Accordingly, it is the man's duty to lead. He cannot force the wife to obey the truth, but he himself must lead in the truth. This is why I could never cave into going to a "compromise" church, just to keep the wife happy. Because, in so doing, I have just forfeited the role of leadership, my headship of the household, for that matter, to the woman. However, that duty and that role is not mine to give away. The LORD has given it to me, to exercise it, and it is the LORD's obligation upon me, not upon my wife. Accordingly, I cannot give away that duty, or any duty, for that matter. What? Can I have my neighbour keep the Sabbath for me? Is a friend's attendance on divine services sufficient for me? Only if these two are true, then can my wife's headship over the home be sufficient. But if the LORD has enjoined upon me to keep the Sabbath, if the Lord has enjoined upon me to observe divine services in accordance with His Word, if the LORD has enjoined upon me to be the head of my wife, then those injunctions are not mine to give away.
Yes, I cannot force my wife to obey. There is no point in my continually arguing about it, either. However, once I have spoken, then it is my duty to walk in the right way. Now: I admit that I need to exercise much soul-wrestling about the truth, to be sure that what I am telling my wife is indeed the truth. Being the head of the household is a solemn and fearful duty. And, there are times when, as the head of the house, I may discern that my wife is giving me sound and solid Scriptural advice. But when I know what the truth is, then for me wilfully not to walk in it, but to choose to forfeit my responsibility to my wife, is a grievous breach of duty that the LORD will not forget, believe me.”